Conversation

This was taken yesterday (Australia Day) with my Nikon 8700. Low light, slow exposure and movement gave me this effect. This is LM and Anne intensely conversing.

Not to be Out Done by the Machines

The drawings to the left were taken from a piece called 'Orbic', ink on paper, 2001. The stream-of-consciousness text below is a piece i shall attribute to Cicada written sometime during 1996;

"help i got what the one bourbon one scotch one beer my fingers are sticky its not from the anal sludge of some deprived lunatic ass hole its from the slimy mildew of a microwaved meat pie with tomato sauce ketchup mustard spices that dices crisis on infinite earth .scratch my eyes they bleed with snow making focus not happen aperture why bother can't see any aperture from i don't no why .coke drug or refreshing liquid of gold proportional value? gold is an ugly rock with no practical value soft as limp cocks melts in the hand not in the mouth dentistry for the gods coke is used in dentistry to persuade white Americans to shit themselves when all hope is removed via the high way railway to Siberia .stop at the interstate and dead will happen to your cousin clive who is allergic to intelligence.clives an ugly man no dog would fuck lived in paris but the rats droves him out his bipolar flesh has anti gravity properties that make him useful to hyper government research to keep the peasants voting for the cunts who fly through the tv advertisement of shallow swamp living.finger lickin good. since clives strapped into ecto plasmic extracting Cuban run harvesting machinery and is guarded by the thousand or so famous five viewers he won't be the one who drops his head in a bucket of dental flosss at the intersection. everything makes sense to know one. and when they were up they were only half way up and when they were down they shot up on junk."

An Odd Shot of Nothing in Particular

This is a fairly non-descript shot, a slow exposure of fairy lights. Taken in Sydney on New Years Eve with a Nikon 8700, my second favourite camera ever.
After idling away an hour or two flicking through the many blogs out there (last count approx. 15 million and 80,000 new blogs per day), i felt compelled to just post something. Now i have a couple of questions; what is the purpose of all those blogs which just seem to made up of gobble de gook? At first i thought it was just some annoying stream-of-consciousness poet until i read on a little and began to notice specific words again and again. It then occured to me that these posts may in fact be artificially created by key word generators, i'm guessing that are used to capture google (and other) searches on these words. Google and alike search engines rate search results based on how often the searched words appear on any site and there are programmers whose specific task it is to optimise sites for these search engines. These blogs are created containing links to the actual site(s) that they are designed to miss direct the search engines toward.
So in conclusion, it appears that not only are the machines annonymously commenting on our blogs (otherwise known as spam and avoided with word verification), but they are blogging right along with us! i'm sure the moderators do what they can, but they are only human and these machines are exponential. However, it does make kind of weird poetry - perhaps even a new genre!

Conan

Ok - this will require a little background information. As well as a co-conspiritor named 'Ciccada', a Mac machine named 'Moovunway', a mysterious 'delightful partner', a very cute neice named 'Matilda', a cat called 'Kodak' and a distinctly average disposition - johndouglas, the mostly harmless artist, has a brother named 'Conan' or 'Conanbadmonkey' to be more precise.
This is a shot of Conan installing the software for his new camera - which i used to take this picture, import, modify and send to his Toshiba via bluetooth by the time he had finished. Now i do not normally like to show off, but with a brother named 'Conanbadmonkey' using a Toshiba while i use a Mac i would be remiss if i did not. Conan and i have been known to conflict on the topic Microsoft verses Aplle. Which is no longer a moot point as Intel now produce Apple's base chipset. Lucky, OSX still shits all over XP.

The Christmas that the Scrooge Forgot

Merry Christmas to all, except those of you with a faith which precludes that kind of merriment. Not that i do not wish you all the happiness which may befall during the silly season, its just - well you know. We must be entering a new age of Religous Correctness - and i'm still getting used to respecting women and not beating my children.
This is our Christmas card to you all this year, an adaptation of the Ninja Turtle - Raphael's 'Madonna and Child'. Now in this image i am the child, but that also means i am Dog - so be kind if you want presents and not a lightning bolt up your bum next year!

Sydney Holiday

My delightful partner and i have just spent a very fun two weeks in Sydney. Where i accumulated a couple hours of video footage and about two hundred images.
This image is entitled 'Flightpath' and was taken from the back deck of where we were staying in Liechhardt. There was a little photoshop used in the creation of this image (ok - maybe it was a lot), but only to give a true feeling of what it was like when these metallic beasts flew over.